Saturday, August 27, 2005

I can't think of a title

Maybe it's just me, but it seems like 27th of August, is a very hot day for meetings and other sorts of stuff to happen. It started with a primary school reunion that most were excited about, but in the end many couldn't make it, so we scrapped it off. Postponed la. I was rather disappointed, but there's always next time. When it's more convenient, bla bla. It's hard for everyone to have a free time slot at the same times. We're just so scattered; form 6, college, working et cetera. Actually that's about it. Felt quite guilty, because we could still go with 2/3 'reunited' friends in attendance, but I also pulled out. Jac and I were inviting, but it's always 'no'; you'd get the feeling of 'Gawd, so no mood liau...'

Emily/Aunt Jo from Bookcrossing sms-ed me about the Bangsar meet also on the same date. I had to decline, since I HAD plans then. Sigh. Then just when this plan failed, my cousin asked me out for buffet. Since gluttony has resided in my stomach, so yea, count me in, misery loves food. Then a Recom.org forum meet. Then Asha text-ed me asking if I wanna go KLCC, and my friend who studies in Russia is there as well. And i can't. Because my cousin's ma has already booked at the restaurant. Then some Friendster bulletin board thing:

"Planet Mars will be the brightest in the night sky starting August. It will look as large as the full moon to the naked
eye. This will cultimate on Aug. 27 when Mars comes within 34.65 M.Miles of earth. Be sure to watch the sky on Aug. 27 2005, at 12:30 am. It will look like the earth has 2 moons. The next time Mars may come this close is in 2287."

It's already 1 am. Wonder if I'm too late.

27th is also the day Wah Lai Toi will be showing the final episodes for Dae Jang Geum (Jewel in the Palace), a Korean show that I'm addicted to.

Other days when I'm so totally DAMN free, there's no invitation, no nice TV shows, no special happenings. Then suddenly a bunch will tumble down on a single day and it's hard to choose just one. It's like having your favourite TV shows running the same time on different channels and you keep switching over during ads, hoping to watch a bit of it.

Other than that, I lost my favourite ring. it's silver and has a curved dolphin pattern on it. With no idea why, I have some attachment to that ring. Now it's alone somewhere on the cold hard floor of my college. I missed it dearly already and I can't get it back 'cause me ma bought it from some street vendor who prolly eats Chips' More. Now you see, next day you don't. Sorry for the corny joke.

I have quite a number of dolphin-themed stuff. I have no idea why people like giving me dolphin-things and I ended up liking them. My mom gave a wood craving when vacationing in Bali. My aunt got me a batik skirt with skipping dolphins. My good friend got me a tiny adorable dolphin 'doll' made from beads (It's hanging from my cellphone).

After three weeks of assignment-less bliss... IT HAS ARRIVED! There's two storyboards I have to complete; one for Animation and another for Video. It's fun planning but the outcome is... uncertain? The only one I hate is graphic design: typography. Just don't like it. Hope all in this paragraph won't be jinxed.

Been trying to convince me ma to let me go to PD for a few hours on Merdeka eve with Lean Chiew and Vishul's gang. Have never gone so far before and my mom has misgivings. She's forever filled with worry of drunken drivers, accidents, tricksters, robbers, rapists etc who may pass my way. Which was prolly why I was pretty sheltered until I was 16. That was the huge argument of using public transport; and it was me lobbying to take public transport back from school, instead of distrubing me dad's work when he has to get me from school. And no joke, he used to forget about me, and it was the time I had no cellphone (now I don't know how I could live without it =P). So I would have to borrow someone's phone or search for a public payphone that usually has the 'out of order' sign, give a call to me dad: 'Hi, remember me? Your daughter?' then from the other side, 'Who?'. Haha, kidding, it's usually 'Oh, shit!'. [Fact : Half of the bad words I know, my dad unconsciously taught me when he drives] The amount of time I used to wait... the bus stop's metal bar already have the imprint of my butt on it.

But now she give me more freedom. Not the amount that I wished for, but I'm far better off than some other teens who can't go out without an accost. I guess the years of arguing finally paid off. From age 13. Wished she had given more freedom earlier, maybe I could had learnt to mix around more. Understand the circle that existed for centuries, of which in seclusion, formed my own assumptions unlike the rest. But it's just a presumption.


I just don't want my college memories to be only of assignments. It's for enjoying isn't it? Because after this, we will be deemed adults who are supposed to be responsible. We're obliged to work, marry, support family, be mature etc. We cannot take the excuse of raging hormones of adolescents to make up for the mistakes we do as 'adults'. We cannot treat time as lax as we do now. Many people of my age, give take a year or two, have already found a place to put their jigsaw-self in. They're settling in their roles, on the way to open up the new chapter of life. As for me, I feel I can be 25 or 30 and I'd still be stuck in the awkward adolescense age.

How would you like to remember your college days?

Just realised I had used 'we' a lot. Sound like nurses in hospitals. 'How are we today?' 'Now we don't want that to happen do we?'


Sometimes, not all, they treat patients like a 5 year old kid.


Signing off,
as usual, trying to be true to self,
Gianne.

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