Thursday, November 24, 2005

Thinking Once Again

I solemnly swear to not rely on thinking that my writing will be safe when typed directly into blog-entry box. Because Firefox failed me. And all gone. All gone, ye read me????

Back to trusty Notepad and Ctrl+S after every few paragraphs. Pffftt.

Today there was a seesaw on my head. One side is giddy happiness and the other is gloomy sadness.And the riders were bloody active. They played from morning till night. It's like cartoon, you know? Jerry bonking Tom with a club (and please, bonking as in 'whack!' and NOT the other... 'bonk' =D). It's like *BONK!* Tom becomes a gentle wussy pussycat. *BONK!* Back to normal. *BONK!* Here nice kitty kitty kitty... BLOODY BRAIN YOU'RE CONFUSING ME!!!!

Or is it my heart? Heart disguising as brain and vice versa?

Hot cold hot cold hot cold, if objects would crack, what about humans?

Why when I think that everything is finally alright and the opposite will come whooping the air out of my stomach? It takes a moment to breathe again. I think simple things in a complicated way. Many a times, I cannot describe emotions nor my thoughts. what I really want. Maybe it's just jumbledness in disguise.

Let me attempt anyway.

I feel like life is getting boring. I feel that as a friend, I'm not good enough. I feel and know that what I do is not up to my standard and it's depressing. I feel that I've gone more selfish and less kind. And I'm feeling exceptionally tired at my ineptness in dealing with... everything, really.



Hmmm... What else.

I feel that I should stop eating Oreos (double stuffing) because I'm getting fat. It's the cookie that's nice though.

******

Polaroid transfers are effin' cool. Oh sorry, mind wandered there. Am 5 days into my four mths holiday and am a bit reluctant to work, but the moolah is needed. Work for money? Or experience? It's just fuel for my interests. And of course, own money = less burden on haggard parents. Sigh. I'll job-hunt next week then.

Going off, as bro wanna use my pc. And curiously, am feeling rather fatigued after midnight... very curious for a night owl like me.

Oyasuminasai, minna-san.


Truly,
gianne

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